In his special sermon of October 05, 2012 on the occasion of the
Annual Conference [“JALSA SALANA”] of the Jamaat Ul Sahih
Al Islam International, the Khalifatullah Hadhrat Munir Ahmad Azim Sahib (atba) of Mauritius reflected on the
fundamental values and structural norms on which the edifice of human society
is constituted. The speech explains, in simple and eloquent manner, the Islamic
family values which are designed to address all the vagaries of human nature
and the complex contingencies of man-woman relationships in society.
Read the Extracts from the Sermon:
Another
infrastructural unit for human society is the family. To constitute a family,
the most important part is the relationship between man and woman. Just as
Islam has laid down certain rules for the honour and responsibility of man, it
has placed woman also on the same footing with respect to man. The Holy Quran
says: “They are a garment for you and you are a garment
for them.” (2: 188)
Besides, the
Quran has placed both man and woman on the same status of equality so far as
their rights are concerned by declaring: “O
you who believe! It is not lawful for you to inherit a woman against their
will; nor should you detain them wrongfully that you may take away part of that
which you have given them, except they be guilty of a flagrant evil; and
consort with them in kindness, and if you dislike them, it may be that you
dislike a thing wherein Allah has placed much good.” (4: 20)
Moreover, the
following verse of the Holy Quran shows the basis of the relationship between
men and women: “And one of His signs
is this, that He has created wives for you from among yourselves that you may
find peace of mind in them, and He has put love and tenderness between you. In
that surely are signs for a people who reflect.” (30: 22)
The only means
of creating a relationship between man and woman is marriage. In today’s world
the choice of a partner is made on the following consideration: beauty, wealth
and social standing. That’s the reason why difficulties arise and multiply, in
social life. Our Holy Prophet (saw) has said: “The first
thing to consider when a partner is sought for is virtue and moral standing.”
Beauty, wealth
and social rank are transient things. The only thing durable and permanent is
virtue which is an asset in a partner and which helps to tide over all the
difficulties that crop up in conjugal life. After marriage, the best way to
entertain good relationship among families has been summed up by the Holy
Prophet in these words: “The best among you is the one who treats his wife
best, and I act better than you towards my family.”
WHY DIVORCE?
In spite of
these guidance and exhortations, it may be that human choice proves defective
for some reason or other. It may happen that the married couple does not enjoy
a blissful life owing to incompatibility of temperament, or as it may be said
in this age of science, because husband and wife are not turned to the same
wavelength. In these circumstances Islam has made the provision of divorce
although our Holy Prophet (saw) has said: “Of all the permissible things divorce is the most
hateful before God.”
May be this
accounts for several Muslim husbands and wives living separately for years and
not divorcing for they have been told that divorce is the most heinous thing in
the sight of God. On the other hand, we see that in western countries they go
to the divorce court for very trifling reasons. Islam ordains that in a case of
difficulties between a husband and a wife, both parties should appoint
responsible people from their own families to act as mediators who would try to
bring about a reconciliation. Consequently the Holy Quran says: “And if you fear a breach between them,
then appoint an arbitrator from her folk. If they (the arbitrators) desire
reconciliation, Allah will effect it between them. Surely, Allah is
All-Knowing, All-Aware.” (4: 36)
However, if the
mediation fails and the reconciliation becomes impossible then they resort to
divorce, just as a surgical operation becomes necessary, when other remedies
prove inefficacious. In the divorce case, too, Islam asks the husband to deal
equitably with his wife as regards her financial situation.
The wife has no
right to remarry until three menses are over. If she is pregnant, the husband
has to provide for her till she has delivered. The husband has to support his
wife and so all financial burdens are put on his shoulders, although the wife
may be an earning member of the family and earn even more than her husband.
NO TO ADULTERY BUT YES TO
POLYGAMY BUT…
I am convinced
that the Islamic teaching regarding marriage and divorce can help to solve many
social problems and eradicate the many ills human flesh is heir to. Many unsuccessful marriages are due to the fact that both men and women
do not have a proper control over their carnal passion and are inclined towards
adultery and fornication. This social evil has taken vast proportions and has become a cancer
worm of society. Prostitution has become a sort of trade and has been legalised
in many countries and is on the way of being legalised in other countries
according to certain newspaper reports. Thus a very big social evil, an evil
condemned by all religions, which has gotten a social status and official
recognition by the laws of the several countries of the world.
According to
Islam, adultery is the enemy NUMBER ONE of society and is punishable by law. However, in certain
circumstances a husband is compelled to seek the companionship of another
woman, for example, if a wife is contaminated with leprosy, suffer from some
incurable disease, or is barren and cannot bring forth children to satisfy the
paternal craving of her husband. In the same way there may be a surplus of
women in a country as it happened after the last world war.
In these
circumstances is it advisable that men and women should live a free licentious
life, commit adultery and give birth to countless unwanted babies that would
become a burden to society and to government? Not at all. To meet this emergency Islam has given permission to man to marry more than one wife when the
need arises, but he should not exceed four wives. Besides all the wives should receive equal treatment which is not an easy affair. The world that was anti-Islam on the question of
divorce has had to resort to it through legislation. The same world is up to
now against POLYGAMY with the ills attendant upon such a measure. Let us hope
it will come up to the standard of Islam and make special legislation to adopt
and legalise Polygamy as it is far better than adultery.