----(An-Nisa 4: 36).
My Friday Sermon (Jumu’ah Khutba) today is on the
subject of divorce (Al-Talaq).Islam places great emphasis on marriage in the sense that it is a sacred contract that cannot be broken for vain and trivial reasons.
Although Talaq (divorce/ repudiation) is allowed,
it must be considered that from among everything which is allowed, Talaq (divorce) is the most hated thing,
the most abhorred by Allah and it is permitted insofar that it does no unjust
damage.
It should in no way be used as part of some ruse which acts as a
pretext for divorce. It can happen that the husband does not like a particular
behaviour of his wife and that he has had enough of her. This is not sufficient
to justify his request for divorce (Talaq). He must not consider only the
negative side of his wife but on the contrary he must assess her good qualities
that may well be greater than the defects. A separation may as well have a
detrimental effect on the behaviour of the couple’s children (if any) who may
become easy prey for Satan.
“And
live with them in kindness.
For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.”
----(An-Nisa 4: 20).
For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.”
----(An-Nisa 4: 20).
This verse clearly
defines the framework of the marital status in Islam, each spouse having some obligations
towards the other. We can also understand from this verse that love alone does
not justify the continuation of the marriage contract. Are there not such acts
as kindness and faithfulness that must be considered by the couple?
Although marriage can
be broken, Talaq (divorce) is only
allowed in extremely difficult cases where life gets really bitter and relations
unbearable. In no case should the husband become a subject of discontent for
his wife. If one of her qualities is disliked by him, another one may well
please him. That is to say, a woman is not completely bad, there is more or
less some virtue in her. Talaq
(divorce) cannot be delivered for trivial matters because no one is perfect.
Discord ? Seek Reconciliation
1. To lecture his wife,
2. To seek the advice
of others,
3. To find an
arbitrator.
4. Or to convene a
meeting of the concerned families.
Such are means which
are very much encouraged by Islam.
“And
if you fear dissension between the two, send an arbitrator from his people, and
an arbitrator from her people. If they both desire reconciliation, Allah will
cause it between them. Indeed, Allah is ever Knowing and Acquainted.” (An-Nisa, 4: 36).
However, consultation
(Shura) is one of the effective ways which Allah exhorts the husband to use in
case of disagreement. The Quran emphasizes that the husband and wife should
submit their disputes to arbitration before resorting to Talaq (divorce). Is it not quite fair to say that today many
parents neglect this great divine counsel by asking their son to cease all
relations with their wife at the beginning itself of an argument? There are
even some who do not realize the requirement that the woman need to be in a
state of purity (these men are not aware of it) and only pronounce Talaq (divorce) against Islamic
precepts.
So if the husband is
against the divine laws, he is the only one to blame. Note that the Talaq (divorce) is still valid even if
it is delivered when the woman is in her period.
Allah throughout his
Mercy urges the husband to grant himself (and his wife) a time of mature and
sincere reflection and gives him sufficient time before the final decision of
separation (such advantage should in no way be neglected). This is why Allah
leaves open the path to reconciliation for a period of three menses after the
pronunciation of the first Talaq
(divorce).
Although the Shari’ah gives us so much advantage,
many men today do not conform to this rule and proceed to the triple
repudiation, i.e. the pronunciation of the three Talaq (divorce) in a single go to make it an irrevocable blow. Are
they not making an abuse of the favour of Allah?
No one can hide or deny
that the number of Talaq (divorce) is
increasing day by day in our community. Family units are exploding today by the
simple pronunciation of the word “Talaq,
Talaq, Talaq” to end the marriage. The word “Talaq” became a game and banter on the tongue of many husbands.
If Allah (swt) has ordered the men to pronounce up to three Talaq (divorce) to end their marriage, there are among them who exaggerate and consider themselves as more learned in religious matters. They even come to a number of one or two thousand Talaq! And even stranger, after committing this innovation in religion they choose with great boldness for immediate reconciliation. Let us ask ourselves a question: Have we already reflected on its meaning (i.e. divorce), on the reason it was prescribed, on its conditions and above all on its consequences? Through the findings already made, it appears that the “Talaq” is often used, pronounced after foolish/ vain disputes and in a moment of anger which boggles the mind or through passion which renders it blind.
If Allah (swt) has ordered the men to pronounce up to three Talaq (divorce) to end their marriage, there are among them who exaggerate and consider themselves as more learned in religious matters. They even come to a number of one or two thousand Talaq! And even stranger, after committing this innovation in religion they choose with great boldness for immediate reconciliation. Let us ask ourselves a question: Have we already reflected on its meaning (i.e. divorce), on the reason it was prescribed, on its conditions and above all on its consequences? Through the findings already made, it appears that the “Talaq” is often used, pronounced after foolish/ vain disputes and in a moment of anger which boggles the mind or through passion which renders it blind.
Verily the Jamaat Ul
Sahih Al Islam and this humble Messenger of Allah, hereby present strongly
condemns the triple repudiation/ divorce in one and same breath, be it verbally
by pronouncing “Talaq, Talaq, Talaq”, or be it by e-mail (or sms etc.) or any other means which
do not respect the Quranic three menses period.
The observation of that
“Iddah” (waiting period) ordered by Allah,
the Master of the Universe, has now become a forgotten thing. What has replaced
it is the alacrity to end married life instantly. As believers in Allah (twt)
and His Blessed Book, meditate on the verse where He says:
“O Prophet! When you divorce women, divorce
them at their prescribed period, and calculate (accurately) the number of the
days prescribed, and fear Allah, your Lord. Do not drive them out of their
houses, nor should they themselves go forth, unless they commit an open
indecency; and these are the limits of Allah, and whoever goes beyond the
limits of Allah, he indeed does injustice to his own soul. You do not know that
Allah may after that, bring about reunion.” (At-Talaq 65: 2).
Yet only one Talaq (divorce) which is permitted and
accepted by the Shari’ah, acts as a
warning, both for the woman and the husband also, without plunging them
permanently in an irrevocable divorce. It is not just (it is not a sign of
justice) to close the door to reconciliation with a single blow while Allah
gives us the ease of using such a Talaq
(divorce) – within a long span of time – that is to the advantage of the
couple.
It should be noted that
if the husband gave one or two Talaq
(divorce) and the period of three menses have elapsed without him having given
the third Talaq (divorce) their Nikah (marriage) is broken. But if they
agree to reconcile (after the period of three menses) and live together again,
they have the right to do so after renewal of their marriage - the Nikah (that is to say, internally between both husband and wife, the husband
can pronounce the Nikah once again
before going to his wife (without the
need to invite other people once again for such Nikah; no need for a Walima
(wedding feast)); without the need for the wife to go through the Halala
(in the absence of a third Talaq)). While if the three Talaq (divorce) is given at once, all of a sudden, the husband has
no right to take his wife unless the Halala
(that is to say, remarriage of the wife with another man and her divorce with her
second husband only after the marriage is consummated) is practiced.
The Quran and the Hadiths
tell us that we should not rush the issue of Talaq (divorce). Take the time that Allah (twt) has granted you. Do
not let the door of regret and despair open. Do not be overcome by Satan who deploys
his greatest ways to destroy homes. Consider the following:
1. Do not take hasty
decisions to end your marriage.
2. Do not pronounce the
Talaq in a moment of anger.
3. Avoid disputes and
quarrels.
4. Try to understand
the weaknesses of women.
5. Exercise tolerance
that Islam has shown us.
6. Do your best to show
yourself reasonable.
7. Do not instinctively
react to the provocation of your wife.
And also, remember this
Hadith:
Abu Said Al Khudri (ra)
reported that Allah’s Messenger (saw) said:“Act kindly towards women, for they were created from a
rib, and the most crooked part of a rib is its uppermost. If you attempt to
straighten it; you will break it, and if you leave it alone it will remain
crooked; so act kindly toward women”. (Bukhari).
May Allah help every
man and woman to understand the Quranic prescriptions relating to divorce, and
hold fast to it in order not to harm and commit sins, for every injustice
perpetrated on the subject shall certainly cause the throne of Allah to shake.
So O men and women have the fear of Allah and respect the agreements you make
with each other in respect to the divine requirements. Insha-Allah, Ameen.
----Friday Sermon of 21 October 2016 ~(19 Muharram 1438 Hijri) delivered by Khalifatullah Hadhrat Munir Ahmad Azim Saheb (atba) of Mauritius.
----Friday Sermon of 21 October 2016 ~(19 Muharram 1438 Hijri) delivered by Khalifatullah Hadhrat Munir Ahmad Azim Saheb (atba) of Mauritius.